JOURNAL 2002

Chapter Title: The Opportunity

The opportunity to transcend our darkness, our beliefs. The opportunity to transcend the violence based social organization called the government.

Radical Honesty with ourselves.

The root of our disease starts when we turn our back on the truth. The truth of the matter is that we do not know what is right and what is wrong, what is good and what is evil.

We start to see good and evil when we become attached to material things, when we make things important. So, anything to threatens that which we make important we call that evil. What we deem as good is that which supports or enable use to have that which we are attached to.

Words never bother you when you are listening with your heart; they only bother you when you are listening with your head. If somebody was to tell you they were going to kill you and you were to react to that with fear, then are in your head thinking about the futures and not the reality of the present moment. You are lying to yourself about the future. But if you were coming from your heart, if you were in your body, you would feel the tension or fear that motivate a person to say such a thing. And out of compassion you would be motivated to assist that person to overcome their fear and find peace.

You do not light a candle and put it in the closet. If you want to teach then you can not just be a good example, you have to bring attention to that example. THAT, takes courage, heart or caring. The weak will call you arrogant or self-righteous, but the wise will see beyond that. We are all not born into situations like the Dali Lama where his every move is observed. He was raised to be an example and then everybody expects that. In that, he is a bad example. For how can anyone else match is position of birth. His example is not one that we can use. The Buddha and Jesus, on the other hand, are real examples of ordinary people (or, in the case of the Buddha, one who made himself ordinary again) who became a good example.

I have no desire to be a monk. But I do want to be part of a team, a team that is going in the direction that I am going in. I feel that we all are headed in the same direction, but only some people are aware of it. Those who can not see the essence are still looking at the form.

It would be nice to find others who have looked beyond the form to the essence. But I no longer expect to find that, or even hope for it. I guess you can say that I have given up on those kinds of ideas.

Do you see the difference between serving people and serving humanity? People come and go, but humanity lives on. Mother Teresa served people, Jesus served humanity. Mother Teresa helped poor and disadvantaged people with the suffering of the physical condition. Jesus tried help all people with the suffering of the heart.

My calling is to serve humanity; what Jesus called a Son of Man—a servant of humanity. Rarely is a servant of man popular; servants of people are usually popular.

I come not to being peace, but division. For it is through division that we grow.

That which you take exception to is that which you have not yet faced. Meaning is something that we created to enable us to have a higher quality life experience.

Love has nothing to do with relationship. We have been taught that we can not experience love without relationship; that we need somebody else’s permission to experience love. Very few have even aspired to transcend the limitation.

To Amy

It has been a long time since I have cried,

At least with anyone.

It has been a long time since I felt deeply,

Except alone.

It has been a long time since I felt deep passion,

Even with myself.

I don’t think I am afraid to feel,

But how would I know if no one will play.

I very much enjoyed your poems,

I wanted to hug you,

But that would mean sex.

Even a smile cannot be shared,

Between those who are afraid of themselves.

When you have to react

To a smile or a hug,

Then you are not free

To love yourself.

And if you can’t love yourself,

Then who can love you?

Thank you for reminding me to cry.

Thank you for helping me to remember to hurt.

It would be nice to see you again,

But we will not smile

We will not hug.

But maybe we will cry.

I would like that.

If only you would call.

If only you would smile.

If only you would be my friend.

Then we could cry

And smile together.

Article: Thank God for September 11^th. I will show the benefits of that day. The only way to wake up America was for the events of that day. Or: September 11^th, the big picture.

Empowered relationships.

Empowered relating through conscious communication.

Title: Beauty is a Choice.

Materialism IS hell. When you make THINGS important, especially yourself, that is making hell on earth.

Title: The Pursuit of Courage

Title: Courageous Living

Title: Conscious Evolution

Title: Understand & Mastering Fear

Monday, February 04, 2002 6:33 PM

The implosion of fear, if complete and perfect, comes to critical mass of negativity and stops its implosion. Then it exploded into a fireball of perfect, unconditional love.

The whole concept of sin comes from the belief that we are flesh and that we are important. Without that belief that we are flesh and not spirit there could not be a concept in our minds of good and evil, of right and wrong.

Choosing to Take My Power Back: the story of my choices to take my power back. There was the choice I made while driving to Denver and saw the cop who had pulled over a motorist. I hated cops and that hate boiled up in me as I saw the cop there on the side of the road. I even moved my car over toward the side of the road to scare him. But then all of a sudden I realized what I was doing, how I was actually hurting myself with my animosity. With this realization, and the realization that I had a choice I could make, I decide to switch from projecting anger and hatred toward the cop to project love and good will.

The sensation was so extreme that I had to stop the car and just cried. The difference between the experience of hatred and love was so extreme, so obvious that I could not contain myself.

I had begun.

It was to be a long journey from the fear, hate and negativity that I was so accustom to, to a place of unconditional love, which I was to first experience about three years later.

I remember another profound experience just six month later, in New Zealand where I was travelling on my way to India. I was camping one night next to a big lake. I was cooking my dinner on the fire in a little camping pot. I only had one meal with and it was going to be a very good one. I remember it being just about ready, in fact it was starting to boil over, so I was attempting to get it off the fire when I spilt the entire contents into the fire. My first reaction was to curse and I could feel the rage start to boil up in me. But then I realized I had a choice and I stopped myself.

Again, the profound difference between the experience of hate and love was so overwhelming that I broke down and cried. It was well worth the loss of the meal. I was on my way to understand what love was; self love.

Until these two experiences I really did not know what self love was.

jmf

Conservatives are people who lack the courage to be honest. They hold back the truth and conserve the reality, even to themselves. I find that conservatives have a lot of desire to secrecy, for they did not want to be exposed. The desire for secrecy

secrecy is the desire to hide the truth, for they are afraid of their reaction to the truth or to other people’s reaction to the truth.

When they do speak they have to have a lot of control over the audience so that there will not be a lot of questions of what they are saying. For questions are something that conservatives are afraid of.

Title: The End of Fear

I am sooooooooooo tired of winter. I have had enough of ice and cold. I really do miss the life on the road. The simple life.

So far I am no closer to find a way to make a living.

In my heart I feel that the way for me is to write some sort of book and publish it; even if I have to publish it myself. Then I will have a ‘product’ to sell that I can put my heart and soul behind.

Tonight I deleted all the games off my computer. I have gotten into the habit of just turning on the computer a playing games until it is time to go to bed. Tonight, for a few minutes, I felt the pain of my ignorance and it motivated me to delete the games. And that same pain motivated me to start writing this.

I really do not know where to beginning when it comes to writing. I have so many different ‘angles’ on the subject that I want to talk about but I do not know where to begin.

The central theme that keeps coming to mind is overcoming fear, for some reason I always think that I have to have the title first before I start writing the book. I just realized that maybe this is why I am not getting any where.

Topic: Practice Appreciation

Article: The Next Buddha/Christ

This will also include a description of what would be the female version of a Christ or Buddha. Admittedly this will be from a man’s perspective and of course will not be what really happens, but it will hopefully put a seed of an idea out there.

People who do not have vision can not see how a little person with a little love and a little honesty can be a great influence on humanity many years or even centuries from now. If there is a person who has the courage to be honest and lovingly shares that vision, and then another person comes along and shares or ‘sells’ that vision with the masses, this can go geometrically. And in today’s world of mass communication this can happen very quickly.

Faith & Honesty: The more honest a person is with themselves the more faith they have in what is possible. When one has faith they realize that there are no limits as to what they can accomplish or what they can become. Nothing is impossible to them. They can be greater the Jesus. They can be God. The only limits are from our imagination and our desire. The real question is what do we want, what is our true desire? That can only be discovered by patiently waiting and watch to see what happens. Only time will tell.

If we are honest with ourselves we must recognize that we do no know our limits.

There are always secrets that we have from people. Sometimes secrets from all people. There are things that we feel that if people were to know these things about us then they would reject us. So we hold those secrets back, we are afraid to be honest about them because they have show a consistent pattern of causing people to reject us. So out of fear of exposure we close down, we never open up and therefore never have to fear our reaction to those that will reject us.

But what about the few that will not reject us. In fact, will we not be closing ourselves off to those few quality people that will appreciate us even more because of that which others can not appreciate?

If we were to be totally honest with ourselves we would have to admit that there has always be at least one example of a person in our life that did not reject us because they knew our deepest, darkest secret. But our minds focus in and make important the majority. We forget that we can not handle a million friends but we want to be liked by them all. We go for quantity over quality.

When we keep secrets we can never truly have quality relationships.

"Education is the ability to listen to almost anything without losing your temper or your self-confidence." Robert Frost

Perpetuating the situation through victim consciousness.

Courage is what it takes to stand up and speak; courage is also what it takes to sit down and listen.
- Sir Winston Churchill

The federal government is the biggest FOR PROFIT business in world.

War is the failure of human intelligence and the human heart.

Think about spending more time with conservatives. republicans, churches, etc..

One of the reason that conservatives make things so important is that they think that things are making them happy. They think that happiness comes from outside of themselves. This is unconsciousness of how their body/mind works and a product of their beliefs or programming. So it is only natural that they want to 'conserve' these "things".

Empower the people, not the politicians.

I 'limit' myself to the present when, and only when, I am fully enjoying and loving what life is offering me. I, like you, do not do that all the time but when I can remember to then I can let go of the past and future and just love what is. The experience or quality of life is so much better when I can let go of future and past.

And when we are experiencing love what need is there of hope. Hope is for those who do not have love and the perfection that it brings. Hope is for people who are not whole and complete. Hope is for people who dream (and therefore are asleep.) Hope is for the religious who, because of the falseness of their beliefs, look to the future for the goodness that will only be experience now ("The Kingdom of Heaven is AT HAND.")

Atonement or At-one-ment is the process of realizing that you are one with that which some people call God. As there are many fingers but only one body. The child sees the puppets and thinks they are separate, but the adult can see that there is only one puppeteer behind the stage and that the puppets are just for the joy of the drama they present. No puppet dies.

The immature mind can not see that oneness of all that is.

This is what I get from Jesus and his story. This is what I found, and the Kingdom that he told me about. I have that Kingdom of Heaven, that Kingdom of God, and I have it now, just as Jesus offered. But I see that his followers, at least those whose writing made it into what is called the Bible today, did not understand him and therefore did not find that Kingdom in their lives. They keep 'hoping' for somebody else to bring it to them. They were lazy or cowardly or stupid so they did not find it. They are the ones who created Christianity--the blind leading the blind, and both have fallen into the pit. They neither enter the kingdom nor do they allow others to (by telling them that the kingdom is coming instead of already here.)

Truth is liberating, so that which does not speak of freedom is not of the truth. Freedom to do what? Well, of course, the freedom to love all that life has to offer. When one has the perfect truth then they are perfectly free to love ALL that life has to offer; unconditional love. To the degree that one still sees evil is the degree that they do not have the light of truth. To the degree that one still sees evil one is 'storing their treasures here on Earth' or serving mammon.

When one 'hardens their heart' they loose the ability to appreciate, enjoy and love what life offers. The people are called conservatives.

Be honest Mike, can you unconditionally love all that life offers, including that which you have been taught is evil? Or is YOUR heart hardened by the lies that you have been taught since birth?

It is, after all, a perfect world, a perfect universe. For those who have eyes to see and ears to hear.

Title: Sometimes (Sometimes I am God)

I always want to have a good experience. So I choose sometimes to be an atheist and sometimes I am an agnostic and sometimes I am a theist. It depends upon what way of thinking helps me experience that goodness; eternal goodness which is what the primitives call God.

With beliefs you lie to yourself and create a blindness about what is; making what could have been or could be more important than what is. This blindness creates a fear (of the unknown). This fear eats away at your inner peace and makes you fearful or conservative.

Any why do we choose to lie to ourselves, because we have made some "thing" important. (why)

American used to be the land of the free and the home of the brave. Now it is the land of obligated and the home of the intimidated.

Manipulation of the masses. It has been going on for thousands of years. Governments, religions, despots tyrants have all been doing it for thousands of years. Who is to say that the US government did not create the September 11 drama just to manipulate public opinion. Some people say that FDR was manipulating the masses in December of 1941 when he knew that the Japanese were going to bomb Pearl Harbor, but he did nothing to stop it. Maybe it is true, and maybe it is not, but did not Pearl Harbor move the public sentiment in the direction that FDR had wanted (to get the US out of the isolationist attitude into the war in Europe).

Only the unconscious can be intimidated by the acts of terrorist.

Title: Power Corrupts. The corruption of hierarchical organizations and how any organization will become corrupted as it gets bigger. The power that any organization has the more corrupt it become. Big government, big business, big unions, big churches are all corrupt and work to the deprecation of the people and to the benefit of the elite or leaders of the organization.

Teach for Peace: instead of sending in the Marine Corp to countries that are not friendly let us send in teachers who will teach the people our secrets to wealth and prosperity. They teach critical thinking and emotional self mastery. The students will first learn this and then they will teach it to others in other countries.

Title: The Way of Passion; the quick way to enlightenment. Two wings of the bird of enlightenment, passion and peace. Going to the extremes so that the middle or center is peaceful. Starts with my story and how I reached enlightenment via the path of passion. The way of both knowing and not knowing.

The conservatives hard hearted attitude towards our foreign brothers and sisters has created an environment where we are hated or disliked around the world, and it is no longer safe for American to travel around the world. This is a way of enhancing the local domestic economies, particularly the travel industry. But this isolates us in the long run and leads the same type of isolation that created W.W. II. This is like the business manager who is focused on the quarterly earnings report and neglects the long run strategies for the company thereby missing opportunities that in the future will benefit the stockholders.

A relationship for me is a means to an end and not an end in itself. So if it holds me back from where I wanted to go then I will let it go.

I can understand Wayne Laugesen's argument against health food junkies ("A Cure for Orthorexia", May 30,2000) and many people should look at their fear of impure foods. This, of course, includes vegetarians and especially vegans. But some of us eat not with our palate or even our minds but with our bodies; meaning that we "feel" the effect that different foods have on our bodies, our minds and our lives. Most of what could be called the Standard American Diet dulls the mind and makes our bodies lethargic. Because of this diet they desire drugs like caffeine, nicotine and sugar to get them back to some resemblance of vitality.

Yea, I am a health food junkie (but I just had pizza for lunch). I know I will not touch what most of my co-workers consider their normal diet. But I prize the clarity of mind and the vital, strong, healthy body that I still have as I approach 50. Most Americans in their 20's are not as healthy mentally or physically as I am at 49. Maybe that is pride, but health is the FIRST factor that determines the quality of life; not money, power, social relationships, or rich foods. Without health nothing else really matters, for you are not able to enjoy anything.

Article: The Evolution of America; the constitution being created for white, male landowners. Then non-landowners were given equal rights, then people of color, then women and someday even children and foreigners will be respected as equals.

Topic: Getting Unstuck

When people are programmed to respond to words in such a way as to abuse themselves emotionally then the ruling class, the ruling people, can use those words to control and manipulate the people.

Things you will not talk about manifest as diseases like cancer.

Quassia: an herb that you use to deal with parasites.

Title: Addicted to Meditation; how we become dependent on meditation to keep us from feeling the depth of our feelings. At some point fear becomes our motivator for meditation. It is like a drug, and escape mechanism.

One Dharma

Understanding ourselves.

Wisdom introduced to faith based systems. Western philosophy is pragmatic. What works? All systems are just methods to get to inner peace. IF YOU WANT TO UNDERSTAND YOUR MIND, SIT DOWN AND WATCH IT.

What are thoughts?

Compassion is the WILLINGNESS to suffer with others.

This is the NEW dark ages.

Do not side with yourself; I am on your side.

Mystical Meditations: Looking into the mystery of the True self.

Title: Mystical Magic

Enlightenment Evangelist & meditation instructor. Clarity & Healthy lifestyle coach.

Living Enlightenment

Fluctuations of enlightenment...the rise & fall

Enlightenment is just another term

The pursuit of perfection is motivation of enlightenment &end suffering

Be more simple.

My perspective is from the human instrument.

Being aware that you are more than you think you are.

Spiritual evolution after pursuit of perfection.

Life can be THIS Good

by Jan Goldstein

Write from emotion like sadness.

Find your song. Know who you are.

An Unplanned Day

Topic: Not All the Answers. It is not good to give people all the answers. Part of the journey is to develop your own ability to see the path in front of you. Without the practice looking for answers you will not develop that ability. It idea in writing is to stimulate and challenge the reader to look for answers.

Topic: Simplistic Writing. My writing will be accused of be simplistic because it is a simple solution to what many consider a complex problem. But simple is cleaner and purer and complicated is more difficult for people to understand and apply to their lives. Keeping it as pure as possible means keeping in a simple as possible.

Anger is a symptom of dishonesty with yourself.

Title: The Power of Appreciation

Title: Stimulation and Challenge.

"Writer's Mentor"

Write what I do not know.

The secret to writing is to say an old thing in a new way, or a new thing in an old way.

I want to know how to communicate to people in a way that they will not take offense.

People of the Light like to judge and be judged. For they are not afraid of word and they have nothing to hide.

Title: Curing the Cancer of Conservatism.

There is no safety or security in domination.

My goal has always been to expand the focus of people, to make them look beyond the narrow minded perspective, to look beyond the small area of their concerns and see the big picture, to be great spirits with great visions and not the mediocre minds of the little people that care only about a limit number of people.

Be aware of when you talk about yourself that you are usually talking about (or people think you are talking about) your limited self. Talking about this limited self tends to separate you from others and alienate you from others.

How about a greater national mission to make our enemies our friends.

Political correctness and politeness are the bane of civilized society for the discourage prejudiced and bigoted ways of thinking from be exposed were they can be healed.

iconoclast n.

1. One who attacks and seeks to overthrow traditional or popular ideas or institutions.
2. One who destroys sacred religious images.

THAT IS ME FOR SURE.

I want to write about Self-Love, or the lack of it, and how that effects
the quality of our communication and relationships. I see people afraid of
THEMSELVES, or to put it more accurately, afraid of their reactions to what
life offers. I want to address this problem in my book.

I have been putting this off until I could come up with a clear perspective
and a language that did not cloud the issues. I feel I am not ready with
both of those.

The greatest threat to our national security is not Saddam Hussein,
al-Qa'ida or Osama Bin Laden. The greatest threat to American security is
George W. Bush. As he pursues a course of offending everybody he is only
making more enemies. His hard-line approach to political relationships is
turning our friends into enemies and giving our enemies more resolve to find
a way to hurt us.
No amount of preparation will guarantee us security against a massive group
of people who want to do us harm. The Golden Rule works for national
relationships as well as personal relationships, if you want to be bombed
then bomb others.
George W. Bush may gain short-term domestic political advantage by creating
international conflicts but the long-term consequences will be devastating
to national sense of peace and security for years to come.

By focusing on how to defend the nation against terrorist instead of also
including so look at what we have done or what we are do that is creating
such animosity, we are insuring that we will be attacked again. Ignoring
our involvement or behavior that attracted the type of aggression that
caused 9/11 will only ensure that we will be attacked again.

Words from William Shakespeare (the Bard) written many years ago:

"Beware the leader who bangs the drums of war in order to whip the citizenry into a patriotic fervor, for patriotism is indeed a double-edged sword. It both emboldens the blood, just as it narrows the mind...

And when the drums of war have reached a fever pitch and the blood boils with hate and the mind has closed, the leader will have no need in seizing the rights of the citizenry. Rather, the citizenry, infused with fear and blinded with patriotism, will offer up all their rights unto the leader, and gladly so.

How do I know? For this is what I have done. And I am Caesar."

"The loud little handful - as usual - will shout for the war. The pulpit will - warily and cautiously - object... at first. The great, big, dull bulk of the nation will rub its sleepy eyes and try to make out why there should be a war, and will say, earnestly and indignantly, "It is unjust and dishonorable, and there is no necessity for it."

Then the handful will shout louder. A few fair men on the other side will argue and reason against the war with speech and pen, and at first will have a hearing and be applauded, but it will not last long; those others will outshout them, and presently the antiwar audiences will thin out and lose popularity.

Before long, you will see this curious thing: the speakers stoned from the platform, and free speech strangled by hordes of furious men...

Next the statesmen will invent cheap lies, putting the blame upon the nation that is attacked, and every man will be glad of those conscience-soothing falsities, and will diligently study them, and refuse to examine any refutations of them; and thus he will by and by convince himself that the war is just, and will thank God for the better sleep he enjoys after this process of grotesque self-deception."

Mark Twain, "The Mysterious Stranger" (1910)

What do you think of the following possible candidates for President:

Gov. Howard Dean of Vermont

Sen. John Edwards

Sen. John Kerry

Story Line: A FBI agent is investigating the death of a politician who died under mysterious conditions. The politician was having hallucinations about somebody trying to kill them before they died.

The FBI had a new department of psychic detectives who said that the politician was killed by a psychic

Look up neuro linguistic programming.

The Spiritual Winter (the new dark ages) that the world is going into now, like the dark ages of the past, where fear and aggression was the mode of operation. Where darkness and confusion rule the minds of the masses.

Conservative: the faithless and hopelessness of the conservative. When conservatives run the country then there faithlessness and hopelessness prevail and the people become depressed. With depression of the people comes depression of the economy and we head into a depression. Recession is a symptom of that depression.

The conservative wants to dominate his enemies. There is no compassion or caring for those who are hurting enough to want to hurt others. The conservative just wants to dominate and destroy. There is no desire to help those who want to do you harm find the peace they are seeking. Heroes help, bullies bomb.

The way of domination is the way of the moral coward, one who does not have the courage to love his or her enemies.

Caring, not coddling is the way to help people feel a positive attitude toward life and toward you.

Can you bring peace into the world if you do not have peace WITH the world.

Self Love First: chapter title; Getting Back to Yesness.

Article Title: The Evils of Domination

Lookup book by Paul Ferini, Silence of the Heart. For reference.

For stimulation on The Cancer Called Conservatism read conservatives like Bill Bennett, Pat Robertson, etc.

SLF: outline, start with our motivation, then how we get there, and how not to get there and why some methods work and some do not.

In the 1990’s, the Soviet Union collapsed under the weight of its inefficient economic and social systems as it tried to compete with the more efficient free market and democratic systems of west.

Now it is the western systems that are under the strain of the over emphasis with the war on terrorism. The question is, how long can this system hold up with the extremely expensive burden that terrorism has put us under. For the terrorist the cost of the war is very limited. For the western world the cost of the war is very expensive.

This is an easy war for the terrorist to win because of that. All they have to do is just create a little havoc every once and a while and the west will over react and throw billions of dollars at national security.

And, with the new constrains on freedom of speech that the conservatives are imposing on the people, democracy will soon collapse too. We are already starting to see that with the loss of faith in the electoral system people are beginning to have. The "don’t question authority" attitude that the conservatives are promoting turn the public into a bunch of voting sheep. And the "don’t make waves" media will only assist the authorities in "dumbing down" of the public.

The cowardly conservatives have played right into the terrorist hands, they are just too dumb to know it.

SLF: It is the natural order of life for all biological forms of life to seek to maximize the quality of life experience and to minimize the pain or suffering that we experience. The ability to maximize the quality and minimize the suffering is directly related to the level of awareness or sensitivity we have to what life is offering. With awareness we can adjust to obstacles or threats BEFORE they become aware a problem.

It is like being in a canoe going down a river. If you can not see because of a deep fog then it could be quite frightening for you would not be able to see where you are going and could run into all sort of problems. The more sensitive you become the capable you become of guiding yourself through life with the least about of resistance.

Title: The Cancer Called Conservatism (CCC)

It has been said that one does not get better until they recognize they are sick. Today we have to recognize that conservatism is a disease before we can begin to cure this cancer. The violence, war, poverty and environmental destruction are all a produce of the cancer of conservatism.

Fictional story line: what would happen if a nuclear device was detonated in Washington, DC during the Presidents state of the union speech and all the chain of command was eliminated, including the entire congress. The story would enfold about how we would have elections without any incumbents. What could happen if we could start again with our government without the cancerous disease that it has become?

The people that who detonated this device would be Americans who are like social doctors removing the cancerous cells of our society.

The courageous love their enemies; cowards want to dominate their enemies.

Where do you start: NOW!

In defense of Arrogance. After watching the story of a smart guy in school who writes a paper on logic that is so good that when it is read by lesser students they are discouraged as they compare it to their work. So this guy throws the paper away so as to not discourage others.

That is not humbleness but ignorance. All of us have something to share with the whole. That something is unique and great. If we are going to share we can not let the truly arrogant person who is discouraged by the work of others let us limit our gift to humanity.

Title: Wake up your Intelligence. About challenging and stimulating yourself to awaken your intelligence. Also talks about what dulls the mind.

"The Power of Now" by Eckhart Tolle. Suggested reading by Danielle Light