Impending Doom

I wonder if people who are about to die have some sense of impending doom, some ‘knowingness’ that they are about to die.  Just before my father died of a massive heart attack he called my mother, whom he had not talked to in almost twenty years, to wish her a happy birthday, which was the next day.  Within an hour of that phone call my father was dead.  He also called both of my sisters but failed to call either myself or my brother. 

But I still wonder, did he somehow ‘know’ or sense that he was going to die.  He had had some tests done on his heart only the week before and was to get back the result the following Monday. 

I wonder this because today I am feeling that feeling of impending doom.  I feel I am going to die or something like that.  No, I would have to say that I really feel I am going to die.  Now, I have had this feeling many times before and, of course, I did not die.  But this time seems to feel different; I do not feel any resistance to the idea of my immediate demise.  In the past there was some resistance to the thought of my immediate death, but today I actually feel that I would welcome it.

Maybe this is because I am depressed, which I could make an argument for, or maybe it is because  I am more ‘mature’ than I was before and recognize this ‘sense’ as only a thought.  Yea, maybe I am just experiencing some depression.  I feel ‘trapped’, which, of course, is only a product of my ways of thinking, but I still feel that way.  I am trapped in a sense of I do not know what I want, or if I know what I want I only want it bad enough for a short time to do something about it.  My deeper desires I don’t know how to satisfy or if I have an idea on how to do that I don’t have the stamina or drive to actually work on the ‘how to’ part of it.  Silly me…

So I am probably depressed and would welcome a quick and painful death.  Opps, did I say ‘painful’ death?  I did…maybe because I like drama.

I have found that there is some truth in this “The Secret” stuff that says we manifest what we focus our minds on.  Could I be manifesting my impending doom just by thinking about it?  I don’t know, but because I am a scientist of the spirit, I am writing this down just in case something happens to me today and then you will know that people do ‘sense’ their impending doom. 

And if I am wrong, I will see you tomorrow…and part of me is kind of hoping that I am wrong so I guess I really do not want die that much after all.

 

The Virtue of Laziness

Jesus was lazy and so was the Buddha. Both of them could read and presumable write but neither of them wrote anything down; probably because they were lazy. They were too lazy to be industrious and they did not ‘create’ anything. They just enjoyed talking and that is all they really did. They had no home to support or take care of. They had no bank account. Their possessions were only what they could carry. They were beggars.

It is true that they lived in climates that did not require much in the way of protection from the elements. In my world, America, I find that the elements, including society and its governments, do not allow me to live the way that Jesus or the Buddha lived.

But I am just as lazy.

I have short passions that motivate me to get up off my lazy butt and do something, but it only lasts for a short time. Then the drive falls away.

I love to talk to people, and I think I have something to offer them. But America does not have ‘public market places’ the way they had in Jesus’ or the Buddha’s time. America has become a nation isolated from its self. People here spend all their time at home or at works and very little in public places.

Today, to reach out to people you ‘have to’ write something, and I am really too lazy to write anything, except short little topics like this.

We Buddhas and Christs have found a peace with the world and this peace kills our productivity. Being not productive we have no desire to hurt any one or anything; we have no inner “dis-ease”. With this peace there is no busyness or business in our world. No business, no work. We Buddhas and Christs tend to live off the charity of others; we beg for our food.

Lazy people tend to be healthier for they do not stress themselves out by working so hard. We just sit around and enjoy what life offers. I will walk or hike ten miles in a day just for the joy of it, but I will not walk a mile to look for work.

We Buddhas and Christs are so lazy we do not create wars. We Buddhas and Christs are so lazy we have a very low impact on the environment. Yet we tend to have a tremendous impact on the human environment. About half of the planets population plays lip service to Buddhas or Christs, but that is about all they do in regard to Buddhas and Christs.

I have too many possessions. I live in a small motor home that I have to maintain and support, and in this day of high fuel prices that takes a lot of work. I have this computer which I use to communicate with people. But it is probably time to get up off my lazy or cowardly ass and go out and talk to people, wherever I can find them. I know I have something to offer, I just find it hard to find people to offer it to.

So in conclusion, lazy people do not hurt anybody and they have a low impact on the environment. How much better would the world be if everybody was at least a little bit lazier?